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Me, Myself & I 
yukiiWe should cherish those times which we have spent. In a hectic city, we must press on and continue our footpaths while overcoming all the obstacles together. Friendship is not for us to take for granted. randoms! |
More than words |
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More than BLAST Randoms
more than words
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ack! my head..
Tuesday, December 2, 2008
ACK.My head is still spinning since I was watching the 10pm Ch U show, Foresenic Heroes. I think my relatives kept talking loudly , making my feel dizzy or spinning. Poor me. :( Well... To be honest, I am really happy to be MHI Christmas Party EMCEE. It's my honour to do this job. :D As the same time, I won't do tiring job like running here or running there. HEH. :D Shh. Dear Joyce, Don't be discouraged! You are given a chance to try to be emcee and do your best to do your job! Like I said before,nobody can replace you, girl! Yeah, practice makes perfect ! Bear it in your mind till after the mission. :D Lalalala... ~ ------------- Ack, ack, ack... My head is hurt! Spinning here. Spinning there. Dizzy, it is not really. Well, It is not serious condition. I just used to it although I do not know what is the root cause. I guess it is because... People's talking goes to my ear then my head, then damages my mind... Deteriorating my mind too... My HI teacher told me... that it is maybe because I didn't drink enough water. I don't know but that is why I said it is not SERIOUS condition. Lalala... I feel uncomfortable. I feel uneasiness. I feel worries. I feel upset. I feel guilty. Whenever I think of my dear friend. I guess I would like to... Keep quiet myself ... Thinking... But I couldn't think well because I didn't know what to do... Give me some time... But the worst thing is... I had a... NIGHTMARE on 1 December 2008, morning. It is an unexpected event which I really don't want it to happen. I dreamt... My dear friends... They started to ignore me. They also started to leave me. My dream was vague. But I can remember is Shi Yi whom she didn't want to be with HI friends. Didn't expect her to be... Involved in my dream... Well, I really feel guilty towards her although I do not know why. But I really MISS her. :( Back to my dream... They started to leave me... One by one, I think. It really hurt me much further than you think especially my SPECIAL friends. My DEAR SPECIAL friends... I fought them. I quarrelled them. I cried in front of them. I created a lot of troubles for them. I scolded some of them. They tolerated with me. They forgave me. They cared for me. They helped me so much. And yet, I did the wrongful things to them. I was just being childish. I was just being foolish. I was just being silly. I was just being stupid. I was just being crazy. I was just being unreasonable. I was just being cruel. I was just being hot-tempered. So I'm It is all my fault. ...Being... Yeah Yeah Yeah, I should not call it to myself. It is because... I'm the child of God. I'm SO SORRY for saying that. But I should know that I'm not alone. Lalala, We are the children of God. God is a forgiving God. PRAISE TO THE GOD. Ack, ack, ack... My head is hurt! Spinning here. Spinning there. All the way... Now, one day... I don't wish to see... All of my friends... To ignore me. To leave me alone. To avoid these, maybe I should join to ANOTHER ministry? I REALLY don't know. But I know it is all my fault. We are not perfect. Satan is just controlling our minds. We can't rid it off ASAP like this way. We need time. But now... I feel uncomfortable. I feel uneasiness. I feel worries. I feel upset. I feel guilty. Whenever I think of my dear friend. Most of all, I feel GUILTY after I treated my dear friend badly. Now s/he treating me back. I don't know but I think s/he can't take it anymore. S/he is replacing me with another dear friend who is younger than me by 1 year old. Another dear friend is happy enough to have my dear friend to treat another dear friend BETTER than me. I really don't know... All i feel is a bit... THREATENING by another dear friend. All I can do is to... Leave them alone. Should I let it go? Should I?? Another dear friend is HI just like me... Who is better than me in all subjects, in speaking, in pronouncating, in chinese language, and all these. So I don't deserve to be treated nicely. My school is lousy because I always sign more. This is what you think. You can scold me if you want. Or my naughtiness.. But let me say, I do have my rights. I DO have my reasons for transferring the school. For choosing my school instead of another school. But what a pity... I lost my chance to have certain CCA which I longed for it. Haha. Lalala, currently, i really don't know. |
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